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Family Constitution

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The Family Constitution is a document intended as the spiritual and legal foundation for starting and running an enduring and happy and sovereign family perpetually free of the encroachments of the corrupt government and unethical family law profession.  It's main goal is to achieve "separation of family and state" by showing people and families how to be self-governing and entirely autonomous.  The book is based entirely on Christian principles found in the Bible which are then supplemented with additional information only in those areas that are important but where the bible is silent, such as law and psychology.  Even though it is based on the Bible, we have written it to be appealing to non-believers as well because it is as much a philosophy book as it is a spiritual work.  Two years of research by the author went into writing the book.  The main focus of the book are Biblical models for RELATIONSHIPS of all kinds, including:

  1. Human-God relationship.
  2. Family relationships.
  3. Husband-wife relationships.
  4. Parent-Child relationships.
  5. Employer-employee relationships.
  6. Relationship to governments and the world.

The end of the book gives you instructions on how to get married without a state marriage license by getting a common law marriage based on a marriage covenant/contract.  The advantage of the marriage covenant is that state courts can't alter or abolish or disregard or overrule the covenant/contract, and the terms of your marriage aren't subject to the whims of corrupt government officials passing some new state legislation nor are they dependent on what state or country you live in.  Instead, the only thing the state courts have jurisdiction to enforce within the relationship is exclusively and only the contract itself, which is fair and based entirely on biblical Christian principles.  This book is inspired by the following scripture and painful experiences of the author being unequally yoked to an unbelieving and downright evil X-spouse:

"Unless the Lord [not the socialist government or a marriage license it issues] builds the house [or the family],

They labor in vain who build it;"

[Psalm 127:1, Bible]

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(last updated 16FEB05, version 1.30!)


(last updated 16FEB05, version 1.30!)

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The Family Constitution draws on works from several prominent Christian authors, such as:

  1. Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family Ministries, who is a famous Christian media personality devoted to strengthening families.  The constitution has quotes from the following products of his:
    1. Focus on the Family ministries radio program
    2. Love for a Lifetime book, which talks about how to develop a strong relationship that will last a lifetime.
    3. Love Must be Tough book, about how to deal with difficult types of sin in marriages such as adultery.
    4. Baby and Child Care book (coauthored by Paul C. Reisser)
  2. The Holy Bible (New King James version).
  3. Chuck Swindoll's Insight for Living Ministries radio program sermons, which are focused on spiritual development and strengthening families.
  4. John Macarthur's Grace to You radio ministry sermons, which are focused on spiritual development.
  5. C.S. Lewis' Mere Christianity book, which is a book that is great for skeptics because in a very orderly fashion, it uses logic and reason and philosophy to bring atheists to the conclusion that there indeed is a god.
  6. The book by Bob Phillips about premarital counseling called How Can I Be Sure?, which is a Christian pre-marital counseling book written by a pastor.
  7. The book by H. Norman Wright and Wes Roberts entitled Before You Say I Do, which is a premarital counseling book intended for Christians.
  8. David Hocking's book entitled Good Marriages Take Time, Bad Marriages Take More Time on building a good and strong marriage (Christian).
  9. John Gray's book entitled Men Are From Mars, Women are From Venus on developing a good and strong marriage (secular).
  10. Gary Stollack's book entitled Until We Are 6, which is an excellent secular book on psychology about how to develop empathy and trust with your child.
  11. Don Dinkmeyer's book entitled The Parent's Handbook, which is a secular but excellent book designed to improve the parent-child relationship and help people become better parents.
  12. Robert Wolgemuth's The Devotional Bible for Dads.  It takes some quotes out of the devotionals from that book.
  13. Barron's Law Dictionary by Steven H. Gifis.
  14. The U.S. Constitution.
  15. U.S. Supreme Court cases.

You can also download selected sections from the table below:

Section # Title Size
Download link
  WHOLE DOCUMENT (last revision 16FEB05, version 1.30!) 3,647 PDF
  Preface and Table of Contents 119 PDF
1 Introduction 43 PDF
2 Our Relationship to God 591 PDF
3 Family Relationships 382 PDF
4 Husband-Wife Relationship 534 PDF
5 Parent-Child Relationship 494 PDF
6 Employer-Employee Relationship 258 PDF
7 Relationship to Governments and the World 565 PDF
8 Sin and Dysfunctional Behaviors 557 PDF
9 Legal Issues and Agreements 378 PDF
10 Definitions 24 PDF

Below is an outline of the content of this very extensive work:




Table of Contents

Table of Authorities

Revision History


1.1 Purpose of this Document

1.2 What We Believe

1.3 Family Priorities

1.4 Family Mission Statement


2.1 Role of Christians

2.2 The Holy Spirit in Christian Living

2.3 Christian Character and Behavior

2.3.1 Church Involvement

2.3.2 Contentment

2.3.3 Discernment in Choosing Friends

2.3.4 Faith

2.3.5 Forgiveness

2.3.6 Hating the Things God Hates

2.3.7 Humility

2.3.8 Joy

2.3.9 Love

2.3.10 Obedience

2.3.11 Prayer

2.3.12 Persistence and Endurance

2.3.13 Political Involvement

2.3.14 Proper Attitude About Suffering and Problems in Our Lives

2.3.15 Repentance and Confession

2.3.16 Responsibility

2.3.17 Righteousness

2.3.18 Tithing

2.3.19 Wisdom

2.4 Our Family Prayer

2.5 Inspiration for the Christian

2.5.1 God's Promises Overcome our Negative Attitude

2.5.2 Jesus Christ is the Source of Our Strength and Self-Esteem

2.5.3 God’s Memorandum to Us

2.6 Are You Good Enough To Go To Heaven?

2.7 The Problem Science Has with Jesus Christ

2.8 Foundational Readings

2.9 Proverbs to Live By


3.1 Role of Families

3.2 Getting Our Personal Act Together: First Things First

3.2.1 Proper Attitude

3.2.2 Mutual Respect Appreciate That People are Different Respecting Your Children

3.2.3 Stages of Personal Growth

3.2.4 Dealing with Personal Problems Effectively

3.3 Rules of the House

3.4 Family Event Schedule

3.5  Importance of Unity in the Family

3.5.1 What is Unity?

3.5.2 Example

3.5.3 Evidence Protect from Disillusionment and Provide for Fulfillment Protect from parental inattention and provide for parental involvement Protect from emotional insecurity and provide for emotional stability. Protect from relational problems and provide for healthy role models.

3.5.4 How to Encourage Unity in the Family

3.6 Family Meetings

3.6.1 Purpose of Family Meetings

3.6.2 Meeting Schedule

3.6.3 Meeting Sequence

3.6.4 Things to Talk About at Family Meetings

3.6.5 Guidelines for Family Meetings

3.7 Techniques for Correction and Encouragement

3.7.1 Should Christians Judge?

3.7.2 What is Righteous Judgment?

3.7.3 The Types of Sin and Correction

3.7.4 Why Should We Correct?

3.7.5 Who Should Do the Correcting?

3.7.6 Who Should Be Corrected?

3.7.7 How Should We Correct?

3.7.8 Under What Circumstances Should We Correct?

3.7.9 What Happens When We Don’t Accept Correction?

3.8 How To Communicate and Release Difficult Feelings

3.8.1 Why We Need Constructive Ways to Release Our Feelings

3.8.2 Effective Listening

3.8.3 Disallowed Modes of Communication

3.8.4 Why Love Letters, Prayer, and Journaling Can Help Realistic Expectations How We Learn to Communicate If Our Past Were Different

3.8.5 The Love Letter Technique STEP 1: Writing a Love Letter STEP 2: Writing a Response Letter STEP 3: Sharing your Love Letter and Response Letter What to Do If Your Partner Can’t Respond Lovingly Making It Safe for Love Letters When to Write Love Letters

3.8.6 Prayer

3.8.7 Journaling

3.9 How to Resolve Family Conflicts

3.9.1 Rules For Conflict Resolution

3.9.2 Should We Argue In Front of the Children?

3.9.3 When Siblings Engage in Combat

3.9.4 How to Hold "Family Court"

3.10 Emotional and Verbal Abuse

3.10.1 How do people become emotional abusers?

3.10.2 Dichotomies of the Emotional or Verbal Abuser Inequality Versus Equality Manipulation Versus Mutuality Hostility Versus Goodwill Control Versus Intimacy Negation Versus Validation

3.10.3 Things That Most Abusers Have In Common

3.10.4 How to Determine if Your Partner is an Abuser

3.10.5 How to Recognize the Emotional Signs of Abuse in Yourself

3.10.6 Characteristics of Verbal Abuse

3.10.7 Categories of Verbal Abuse

3.10.8 Categories of Behavioral Abuse

3.10.9 Checklist for Crazymaking

3.10 Sexual Morality


4.1 Dating Etiquette

4.1.1 The Stages of Intimacy

4.1.2 General Sexual Guidelines for Dating

4.1.3 Principles of Loving Toughness During Courtship/Dating

4.1.4 Guidelines for Parents Dealing with Dating Children

4.2 Premarital Inventory and Planning

4.2.1 Questions to ask a prospective spouse Family Background Sexuality Children Communication Decisions in Marriage Finances Insight Questions Religion

4.2.2 Danger Signs: What to watch out for

4.2.3 Sample Wedding Ceremony

4.2.4 A Poem for the Marriage Day

4.2.5 A Marriage Benediction

4.3 Purpose of Marriage

4.4 Role of Husbands

4.4.1 How Can a Husband Be His Wife’s Best Friend?

4.4.2 What Does "Love Your Wife" Mean?

4.4.3 What Does It Mean to "Honor Your Wife"?

4.5 Role of Wives

4.6 Mission/Vision Statement for the Marriage

4.7 Marriage Event Schedule

4.8 Crucial Components of Marriage

4.8.1 Common Spiritual Beliefs and Faith

4.8.2 Shared Commitment

4.8.3 Love

4.8.4 Communication What Kills Communication What Creates or Enhances Communication

4.8.5 Sex and Affection Purposes of Sex and Affection The Four Fundamental Laws of Sexual Satisfaction in Marriage

4.9 Basic Rights in a Relationship

4.10 How to be Best Friends with Your Spouse

4.11 Dealing with Differences Between Men and Women

4.11.1 Comparison Between Men and Women

4.11.2 Behaviors Women Can Use to Score Points with Men

4.11.3 Behaviors Men Can Use to Score Points with Women

4.12 Money: The Great Mischief Maker

4.12.1 Facing Money Problems Ownership Security Greed Control

4.12.2 How Should We Look at Our Money? Provide Basic Material Needs Support the Work of the Gospel Help Others in Time of Need Enjoy the Blessings of God

4.12.3 Don’t Let Money Control Your Life! Honor the Lord First Stay Out of Debt Be Content with What You Have Depend on the Husband/father to Provide Invest Wisely for the Future Live by a Budget Don’t Worry About Material Things

4.13 Marriage and Family Counseling

4.14 Divorce

4.14.1 What God says about it

4.14.2 What Kids Should Do If Their Parents are Divorced

4.14.3 Statistics on Divorce

4.15 The Humorous Side of Marriage

4.15.1 Women’s Rules for Relationships

4.15.2 Men’s Rules for Relationships

4.15.3 Marriage Dictionary

4.15.4 Letter to my Wife/Husband

4.15.5 Quotes on Marriage

4.15.6 The Five Kinds Of Sex

4.15.7 Marriage as Slavery

4.15.8 Tips for the Marriage Minded

4.15.9 The Marriage License

4.15.10 The Lifetime Haircut

4.15.11 The Husband as Anti-Hero

4.15.12 How the Predatory Female Uses Guilt to Manipulate Males


5.1 Goals of Parenting

5.2 Role of Parents

5.2.1 The First Parent: God

5.2.2 Role of Fathers

5.2.3 Role of Mothers

5.3 Role of Children

5.4 Characteristics of Empathetic and Effective Caregiver Communications

5.5 Importance of Encouragement

5.6 Types of Misbehavior

5.6.1 Attention-Motivated Misbehaviors

5.6.2 Power-Motivated Misbehaviors

5.6.3 Revenge-Motivated Misbehaviors

5.6.4 Displaying Inadequacy-Motivated Misbehaviors

5.7 How Parents Can Fight Their Irrational Beliefs

5.8 Disciplinary Communications Fostering Social Responsiveness and Competence

5.8.1 Positive and Negative Reinforcement

5.8.2 Punishment

5.8.3 Disciplinary Communications

5.8.4 Communication of Adult Feelings and Expectations

5.8.5 Examples of Good Disciplinary Communication Sibling Problems Peer Aggression Stealing and Lying Child Desires for Immediate Gratification Child Sexual Behavior

5.8.6 Summary

5.9 Discipline and Problem Solving Techniques

5.9.1 Strategies for Identifying and the Motive of the Misbehavior and Applying Discipline

5.9.2 Who Owns the Problem?

5.9.3 Discipline and the Consequences for Misbehavior

5.9.4 Cooperative Problem-Solving Techniques

5.9.5 Talking Through Problems by Exploring Alternatives

5.9.6 Use of I-Messages

5.10 Answers to Common Questions Children Ask

5.10.1 Does God really know me?

5.10.2 Does God want me to be afraid of him?

5.10.3 Does God need me to pray so that he can do what he wants to do?

5.10.4 Will God punish me when I sin—even if I don’t know I’m sinning?

5.10.5 Does God ever get sad?

5.10.6 Should I tell the truth even if it hurts someone’s feelings?

5.10.7 Is saying "I’m sorry" the same as repenting?

5.10.8 Is being proud good or bad?

5.10.9 If prayer really works, why don’t doctors prescribe it?

5.10.10 If I’m supposed to love everybody, why shouldn’t I be friends with everybody?

5.10.11 Why do we have to follow so many rules?

5.10.12 Why do good people suffer?

5.10.13 Why do I sometimes feel like God’s not there?

5.10.14 Does God hate anything?

5.10.15 If someone hurts me, why can’t I hurt that person back? 5-9

5.10.16 Why do we have to forgive people who hurt us?

5.10.17 How do I love someone I don’t even like?


6.1 Role of bosses

6.2 Role of employees

6.3  The Four Types of Workers

6.4 The Nature of Work

6.5 Principles of Leadership

6.6 Mission Statement for Effective and Ethical Management

6.7 The Humorous Side of Work

6.7.1 Prison Life vs. Full-Time Job

6.7.2 Murphy’s 26 Laws of Bad Management

6.7.3 Phases of a Project


7.1  Biblical Law:  The Foundation of All Law

7.2  Natural Order

7.3  Rights v. Privileged

7.3.1 Rights Defined and Explained

7.3.2 Fundamental Rights: Granted by God and Cannot be Regulated by the Government

7.3.3 What is the Difference Between a "Right" and a "Privilege"

7.4  Government

7.4.1 The purpose of government: protection from harm and evil

7.4.2 How government and God compete to provide "protection"

7.4.3 The purpose of income taxes: government protection of assets of the wealthy

7.4.4 Government as idolatry/religion

7.4.5 Socialism is Incompatible with Christianity

7.4.6 Government-instituted slavery using "privileges"

7.4.7 Civil Disobedience to Corrupt Governments is a Biblical Mandate

7.4.8 Code of Ethics for Government Service

7.5 Role of Law

7.6 Role of Politicians and Rulers

7.7 Role of Citizens

7.8 The Nature of Property

7.9 Thomas Jefferson on Property Rights and the Foundations of Government

7.10 Testaments of Truth

7.11 The Freedom Test

7.11.1 Are You Free or Do You Just Think You Are?

7.11.2 Key to Answers

7.11.3 Do you Still Think You Are Free?

7.12 Sources of Government Tyranny and Oppression

7.12.1 Deception: The Religion of SATAN and our government

7.12.2 Presumption

7.12.3 Illegal Acts and Legal Obfuscation

7.12.4 Propaganda and Political Warfare

7.12.5 Willful Ignorance of Public Servants

7.12.6 Compelled Income Taxes

7.12.7 Government Identification Numbers: Mark of the Beast Coercion: The Enumeration At Birth Program Coercion: Denying benefits for those who refuse to provide Socialist Security Numbers

7.12.8 Paper Money The Founders Rejected Paper Currency War of Independence Fought Over Paper Money President Thomas Jefferson: Foe of Paper Money Wealth confiscation through inflation The Most Dangerous Man in the Mid South

7.12.9 The Federal Reserve The Federal Reserve Explained Lewis v. United States Ruling Federal Reserve Never Audited

7.12.10 Debt

7.12.11 Surrendering Freedoms in the Name of "Government-Induced Crises"

7.12.12 Judicial Tyranny Conflict of Interest and Bias of Federal Judges Sovereign and Official Immunity Cases Tried Without Jury Attorney Licensing Protective Orders "Frivolous" Penalties Fifth Amendment Abuses Nonpublication of Court Rulings Background Publication Procedures Have Been Changed Unilaterally Publication is Essential to a Legal System Based on Precedent Citizens In a Democracy are Entitled to Consistent Treatment from the Courts Operational Realities of Non-Publication Impact Of Non-Publication Inside the Courts Openness Constitutional Considerations Opinions Are Necessary, Even in "Insignificant Matters" Questions to Ponder

7.13 A Biblical Response to Those Who Say We Should Disarm

7.14 Living in a Pagan/Godless Culture

7.15 How to Teach Your Children About Politics

7.16 The Bill of No Rights

7.17 Am I A Bad American?--Absolutely NOT!

7.18 If Noah Were Alive Today

7.19 Prayer at the Opening of the Kansas Senate

7.20 The Ghost of Valley Forge

7.21 Last Will and Testament of Jesse Cornish

7.22 My Country?

7.23 Grateful Slave

7.24 Economics 101


8.1 Sin Defined

8.2 Sin as Spiritual Addiction/Slavery

8.3 Types of Sin

8.3.1 Abortion

8.3.2 Adultery Damaging affects of Adultery Techniques for preventing and dealing with adultery

8.3.3 Anger The Causes of Anger Anger in the Home Reactions to Anger Overcoming Anger

8.3.4 Envy Envy Defined Envy in the Church Envy in the World Wanting to be Envied Envy and Women Envy is Destructive Overcoming Envy Wisdom Conquers Envy

8.3.5 Gossip and Slander

8.3.6 Greed Kingdom Perspectives The Eucharistic Lifestyle Greed and International Problems Greed in Unions Greed and Prophecy Overcoming Greed A Warning to Yuppies

8.3.7 Homosexuality

8.3.8 Idolatry

8.3.9 Laziness Laziness in Loving Laziness, Love, and Will Too Lazy to Nurture Too Lazy to Enjoy Too Lazy to Become A Style of Procrastination Getting Rid of Sloth

8.3.10 Lust While You’re Waiting for the Second Coming Lust As Illusion Lust as Immaturity Lust as a Denial of Death The Insights of Feminists How to Conquer Lust Alternatives to Lust

8.3.11 Lying

8.3.12 Murder

8.3.13 Pride Pride Infects the Spirit Pride Ruins Relationships Pride Destroys Those We Love Pride Can Destroy A Nation Develop Healthy Humility

8.3.14 Selfishness

8.3.15 Sexual promiscuity/fornication

8.3.16 Unwillingness to submit sexually to our marriage partner

8.4 Dysfunctional Behaviors

8.4.1 Authoritarianism

8.4.2 Chemical addictions

8.4.3 Cyberaddiction Symptoms Treatment

8.4.4 Gambling addiction Symptoms Treatment

8.4.5 Obsessive/compulsive (OCD) disorders Symptoms Treatment

8.4.6 Phobias

8.4.7 Poor communication skills

8.4.8 Pornography addiction

8.5 Common Sinful Excuses to Evade Responsibility for Sin

8.5.1 It's an Obsession

8.5.2 Its an Addiction

8.5.3 It's an Impulse

8.5.4 It's Hormonal

8.5.5 It's a Sickness/disease

8.5.6 It's a Compulsion

8.5.7 It's a Weakness

8.5.8 It's Genetic

8.5.9 It's Environmental

8.5.10 "It's my Upbringing--The Way I Was Raised."

8.5.11 "It's My Personality"

8.5.12 "It's My Disposition"

8.5.13 "It's Chemical"

8.5.14 "It's a Bad Habit"

8.5.15 "The Devil Made Me Do It"

8.5.16 "It's My ___________'s Fault"

8.5.17 "That's Just the Way I Am"

8.5.18 "I Can't Help It"

8.5.19 "I Was Born That Way"

8.5.20 "I'm Diagnosed as Having ______."

8.5.21 "It's Not Hurting Anyone."

8.5.22 "Who Are You to Judge?"

8.5.23 "Where is Your Love?"

8.5.24 "Jesus Accepts Me, Why Can't You?"

8.5.25 "Nobody's Perfect"

8.5.26 "Don't Play God With Me."

8.5.27 "We're Mutually Consenting Adults"

8.5.28 "Everybody Does It"

8.5.29 "It's Adult Entertainment

8.5.30 "It's My Body"

8.5.31 "It's Not a Sin to Me"

8.6 The Solution for Sin

8.6.1 Jesus' Advice on How to Deal With Sin

8.6.2 Personal Relationship with God

8.6.3 God's Grace

8.6.4 Sanctification: To be set apart

8.6.5 The Holy Spirit Satan Condemns, the Holy Spirit Convicts Truth Versus Condemnation Jesus' Conviction of Sin

8.6.6 Controlling the Mind

8.7 Diagnosing Sin in Interpersonal Relationships

8.8 Statistics On Sin in the Bible


9.1 Introduction

9.2 Religious Freedom in the Public Schools

9.2.1 The First Amendment

9.2.2 The Establishment Clause

9.2.3 Freedom of Association

9.2.4 Right to Know

9.3 Five Reasons Why Christians Should Not Obtain a State Marriage License

9.3.1 REASON #1. The definition of a "license" demands that we not obtain one to marry.

9.3.2 REASON #2. When you marry with a marriage license, you grant the State jurisdiction over your marriage.

9.3.3 REASON #3. When you marry with a marriage license, you place yourself under a body of law which is immoral.

9.3.4 REASON #4. The marriage license invades and removes God-given parental authority.

9.3.5 REASON #5. When you marry with a marriage license, you are like a polygamist.

9.3.6 When Does the State Have Jurisdiction Over a Marriage?

9.3.7 History of Marriage Licenses in America

9.3.8 What Should We Do?

9.4 Fiduciary Duty

9.5 Record Keeping

9.6 Asset and Liability Inventory at the Time of Marriage

9.7 The State of California’s Default Pre-Nuptial agreement

9.8 Questions And Answers for Prospective Spouses Who Can’t Accept Having to Sign a Pre-Nuptial Agreement

9.8.1 Doesn’t post-divorce spousal support make marriage into the equivalent of prostitution?

9.8.2 Don’t the legal aspects of marriage amount to legislating morality?

9.8.3 Do pre-nups make divorce easier to get?

9.8.4 Are pre-nups based on mistrust?

9.8.5 Why get married at all if you are going to have a pre-nuptial agreement?

9.8.6 So how do I keep my husband faithful if I don’t have a big legal stick to beat him ruthlessly with when he misbehaves?

9.8.7 Do pre-nuptial agreements put too much of the focus of the relationship on selfishness and materialism?

9.8.8 Do pre-nuptial agreements have risk reduction advantages for both spouses over the state's default pre-nuptial agreement?

9.8.9 Doesn't the State's Default Prenuptial Agreement Encourage Domestic Violence or Spousal Abuse?

9.8.10 What should I tell my fiance about why I feel the need for a pre-nuptial agreement?

9.8.11 Wouldn't I be the laughing stock of all my family or friends or coworkers if I signed a prenuptial agreement?

9.8.12 Is it true that most family law attorneys don't like pre-nuptial agreements and advise against them simply because they eliminate the need to litigate and thereby decrease profits?

9.8.13 Aren't prenuptial agreements supposed to give me MORE freedom and autonomy and not less? It doesn't seem like this one does.

9.9 Pre-Nuptial/Marital Agreement