New Bible Revelation: How It All Began

Here's a legend, recovered from a dead sea scroll, that finally explains how it all came about.

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Jacob Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she became known as the Amazon Dot Com.

She spoke unto Jacob, her husband, "Why doth thou travel far from town to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Jacob did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, Dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Jacob thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And it came to pass that the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Jacob sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent.

But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secret himself inside Jacob's drum and was accused of insider trading. And other young men did take to the Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. These were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Siderites, or NERDS for short.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums, that no one noticed that the real riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

Dot again spoke and said, "Oh, Jacob, what we have started is being taken over by others."

And Jacob said, "Verily, verily we need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, are we not "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner-Operators?"

"YAHOO", said Jacob as he looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, (known also as ebay)

And that is how it all began. . . .

Actually, It wasn't Al Gore after all.