A police officer pulls a Navy Chief over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Navy Chief: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?

Navy Chief: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Navy Chief: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Navy Chief: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Navy Chief: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

Navy Chief: Sure. Here it is. (It was valid.)

Captain: Who's car is this?

Navy Chief: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card. (The driver owned the car.)

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

Navy Chief: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. (Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.)

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

Navy Chief: No problem. (Trunk is opened; no body.)

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Navy Chief: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I
was speeding, too!