Old Blue

A young farm lad from northern Iowa went off to college, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he had foolishly squandered away all of the  money his parents gave him. Then he got an idea. He called his dad. "Dad," he said, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with!  Why, they actually have a program here at Iowa State that will teach our dog Ole Blue how to talk!"

"That's absolutely amazing," his father said. "How do I get him in that program?"

"Just send him down here with $1,000" the boy said. "I'll get him into the course."

So, his father sent the dog and the $1,000. About 2/3 way through the semester, the son had spent all the money. The young man called his father again.

"So how's Ole Blue doing, son," his father asked.

"Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," the son said, "but you just won't believe this - they've had such good results with this program that they' ve implemented a new one to teach the animals how to READ!"

"READ," said his father, "No kidding!  What do I have to do to get him in that program?"

"Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class.", the boy said.

His father sent the additional $2,500.

The son now had a big problem. At the end of the year, his father would find out that the dog could neither talk, nor read.  The son carefully considered the problem and finally arrived at the perfect solution.  Even though Ole Blue had been the son's constant and faithful companion since he was a small boy, he shot the dog.

When the son arrived home at the end of the semester, his father was very excited. "Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk and read something!", the father said.

"Dad," the son said , "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole Blue was in the living room kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he usually did. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your dad still messing around with that little redhead who lives in town?'

The father exclaimed, "I hope you SHOT that son-of-a-bitch before he could talk to your Mother!"

"I sure did, Dad!"

"That's my boy!"

The son went on to become a very successful attorney and U.S. Congressman.